WAAAAAAAAHHHHH... I CAAAANNNNN'TTTT

Can't really means won't when it comes to training.

I was supposed to run 20 miles today. My last obscenely long run before the marathon. However...

I was up late last night.
I didn't sleep all that well.
I found out my parents were in a bad accident yesterday.
My son has a BIG track meet after school.
My house is kind of a mess.
It was already 74 degrees at 7:45 am.
I need to buy new shorts for hot weather.
I woke up kinda late this morning.
I can always do it tomorrow. I have time tomorrow...
My stomach feels weird.
I'm not feeling my best today............




JUST KIDDING! I DID IT!

But don't you know there's ALWAYS a "good" excuse not to work toward a goal... Always. What's your excuse????

This run truly humbled me. It took every granule of will to complete. This was by far the most difficult run I have ever experienced in my life- and I chose my "back yard" a.k.a. the boardwalk as my route, thinking it would make it easier. I was certain that this would make it easier. By mile 17 I had to keep visualizing the end and imagining how it would feel to walk back into my house after this grueling voluntary torture. I had to picture the relief of being in a cold shower and then in bed. I fought the desire to quit early and made quick peace with the fact that I had to walk a little. I also visualized the option of quitting early and how that would feel. I realized there was no way I could accept quitting comfortably. I knew I could cover the distance- even if I had to walk the last few miles. Without question, I can do it. So I decided that nothing would change and that I'd finish.

20 miles in 3 hours 49 minutes. Decent training pace. A bit slower than I wanted, but with all the walk breaks I took, I believe walked about one full mile. I stopped to refill my water 3 times, stopped to buy a gatorade once, had 2 bathroom stops, and slowed down twice for the typical "wardrobe malfunction" that seems to be an integral part of any long run for me. By mile 16, I was feeling a little nauseous. I was concerned about heat exhaustion. (It was close to 80 degrees so that means my body felt like it was 100 degrees. I can do shorter distances in this heat without even thinking about it. But 20 miles seems to be a completely different song and dance.) I also had two very unusual cramps that did not want to leave: one in my stomach and one by my right lung. I'm still trying to decide if this was more difficult than natural child birth. I think it was...